She then shared the insight of St. Charles Borromeo:
“God wishes us not to rest upon anything but His infinite goodness; do not let us expect anything, hope anything, or desire anything but from Him, and let us put our trust and confidence in Him alone.”
Yes, St. Charles speaks the Truth - but one that is often difficult to live.
Watkins' questions and St. Charles' observations prompted my writing the following personal reflection - in hopes something in it will resonate with you and stir your soul:
Lord, You know well, how often I have allowed the demons of despair to destroy my spiritual and physical peace. You know Lord how I allowed this destroyer of souls to take me to a point where I begged You to end my physical life. How painful it is, even now years later, to recall those dark days, those hopeless days.
If I had really believed
in You at that time, if I had placed my hope in Your hands, there would have been nothing I would fear, nothing that would have caused me to despair. It should not
come as a surprise then that I have struggled immensely in my spiritual journey.
Folly it is for me or any other sinful soul to put our trust in anyone or
anything but You. Yet time after time, I did what I knew was futile and
eternally destructive.
My twin sister’s death was a devastating loss, and, at the same time, a powerful and undeserved gift - a reminder of what You intend for all of us and what we can expect when we place our hope in You – eternal salvation. You know Lord how I begged for Jane’s return to Your loving and merciful embrace and how she fought (You and me) tooth and nail. She too was tormented by the demons of despair as she battled with cancer for so many years.
But prayer and hope in You never fails. In Your mercy, You answered my long-standing prayer that she not die without first reconciling with You and without receiving the Last Rites. You sent a priest to her bedside. You welcomed Jane home. What more proof does this obstinate thick-headed man need after the miracle of Jane’s salvation?
Lord, help me to place my hope and trust in You and You alone - not in others or even myself. Fill me to overflowing with the virtue of hope, so that I will command the demons of despair to depart the instant they arrive. Lord, let me never forget that I will destroy my soul “if hope in You is not present” in my heart."
You created us to know love and serve You on this earth and to be with You eternally in the next. You promised Lord that good will come to those who trust and love You. That is Your promise to me and to all who believe in You.
You are God! You keep all Your promises! Nothing, no one can prevail against You, almighty and loving Lord – You who offers us eternal life.
May I never lose sight of Your promises. Let nothing or no one steal this hope from me!
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